Family Visits

Steve's brother Mark and his wife Nannette flew down to Texas to visit with his folks; who live about 30 minutes from us. We met them Thursday night for BBQ and then they stopped by the house for a few hours.

After Steve got off work on Friday we drove up to the inlaws and had supper and stayed until after 9:00.

Today, another of Steve's brothers, Greg, his wife Stephanie and their three girls drove down from Kerrville to stay with his dad as well. Steve was up and ready to head there for the day about 9 this morning.

Now, I'm not the most social person. I wasn't raised in a social environment. Sure, we occasionally had guests over. And during those times you behaved a certain way; company maners. Everyone's manners changed; including my parents. As a child I actually use to like having company come over because that was the only time we even got close to portraing a stanard family unit. Even a pretense for a few hours for a child was a welcome repreieve.

I have to say that age and circumstances have made me more antisocial than I have ever been in my life. I genuinely like and enjoy being around every person that was in that house; just not for 12 hours out of my day. I can bearly stand to be around Will that much in a day.

So I stayed home and sewed today and Steve and Will went and spent the day with the folks. I joined them arounf 5:30 for supper, intending to stay until about 9:00. But the oddest thing happend.

The more I set there laughing with my sister-in-laws the more I missed my sisters. The more I realized I didn't have sisters any more. Just one sister, the "live one" as we joke now.

I got quiter and quiter as memories of past visits with my sisters played through my head. I realized that at every family get together we always over indulged in alcohol. For many of us, it is the only way we can allow ourselves to relax. The only time we felt safe to be who we were and know we were loved regardless of what came out of our mouth. And believe me, get me drunk and there is no telling what I am likely to tell you.

Then I realized I had not been in the mood to drink the entire time we'd been together. And this is a drinking family. Putts mine to shame I tell you. Well, they are mine . . . it puts the one I grew up with to shame. I even woundered why I didn't want a drink every time someone offered me one. It was odd. I'm not a big drinker at all. But I like to indulge with my family.

And I think that was the problem, I was subconsiously trying to safeguard myself by staying away from the alcohol.

Regardless, when I begin to miss my sisters I went in the other room and tried reading. Just backed away a little. It didn't help. By 8:00 I told Steve I needed to come home and I did.

Then I cried all the way home. When I got in the house, I put a bottle of amareta in the freezer to chill and took a long shower.

I quess I'll have that drink after all.