Coach Envy

At my age, I've felt many different types of envy. Envy related to my house, job, husband, kids, talent, finances, looks, intelligenc, spelling, writing, social skills. You name it, at some time in my life I've been envious over it.

But just when I thought I'd experienced every envy there was out there, a new one came along. Thursday night, I experienced my first case of coach envy.

Will is playing his first organized sport, kickball. It's sponsored by the YMCA. And yeah, he's four, so there is not a lot of regulation or structure. All the coaches are volunteer. But Will's coach . . . she's something special. Special ED as my girls would say.

You have to understand that both Bonnet and Tori played TONS of sports when they were young; t-ball, pee wee basketball, soccer. They took piano, tumbeling, dance. Then until Will, I was involved in running and biking to the degree I attended tons of coached training events. I know something about coaches; volunteer and otherwise.

We've played two games. Before both games, our coach emailed us and told us which field we would be playing on. After lugging our chairs out and setting up for the game, some other team would show up and declare we were in the wrong field and we'd move -- both times. And this is just the beginning.

All parents were sent a list of rules for the 4-year old t-ball games. They included things like: 1) at each kick everyone will advance only one base, 2) each inning will be 8 minutes and batters will rotate until the time is called, 3) parents should play outfield with their children but never touch the balls, 4) parents should NOT run bases with their children.

I can't remember them all, but these are the one's she has broken repeatedly.

The first game she just had all the children bunched up around the pitchers mound and it was a mad dash until when a ball was kicked. Someone must have complained because she tried to do a better job and assigned three children to base; the rest lined up one behind the other at the pitchers mound and took turns chaising the ball.

She gets so aggresive about things that don't matter that other coaches give into her just to prevent problems. According to the schedule I got, our team should have been wearing white on Thursday night. She told us to wear blue. Then when we ended up on the right field, that team was wearing blue. She was so agressive, the other coach had everyone on his side change their shirts. The first game, she convinced the ref that since the other team only had four players, we would only let four of our's bat . . . can you say four minute innings?

She's not mean, per se. She doesn't yell at the children and demand more of them than what they are capable of giving. But then that might require more organization that she's capable of.

So . . .

The team we played against on Thursday had the best coach. He encouraged every child. had them all set up as a true outfield. Each time a ball was kicked it was run to a different base so everyone got a chance to play. Oh, and he showed up on the right field with the right color jerseys . . . you gotta love that about him right off.

I spent brief moments during the game wishfully wondering how much more fun Will might be having if we'd only been on the other team.

Not that Will is unhappy at all. It's just us old mom's sitting at the sideline doing nothing that are complaining. :)