The Bitch and the Beans

So . . .

With the emergence of my true self, I have found something that has been missing for a while . . . my backbone.

Twice today, I behaved in a manner totally beyond what I thought I was capable of. At least, capable of any more.


THE BITCH

I was checking my emails and had this really NASTY email from a customer. She was irate because she paid $9 for an electronic pattern and I STILL HAD NOT SENT it to her.

I have a police of emailing out e-patterns within 24 hours of purchase; not including weekends. I assumed she had ordered yesterday after my orders were finished for the day. So I responded as politely as possible and told her that as much as possible I didn't fill orders on the weekends as those were saved for my family.

Is this an odd concept? Don't most people get some days off?

I also explained that if her order had arrived after I shipped off orders Friday morning they would have rolled over into the weekend bin.

Within five minutes I have two different emails from her. The first one reams me a new one. I should POST these restrictions online and FRIDAY MORNING should not be a weekend cut off. Oh, she said much worse. She turned me into ETSY for bad business practices. Blah, Blah, Blah.

And yep, before I got to her other email there was an email from ETSY saying a UNFAIR practices complaint had been filed against me. I had to fill it out and tell them what was going on.

Then I got back to her last email, and I will admit by this time I am not feeling nearly as nice. In this email, she tells me that her order was placed Thursday, SO THERE. "Not explain," she told me. "How I still didn't have my pattern?"

My response?

Because you're a bitch?

Yep, I really said it. Then I told her that I was going to refund her money and block her from purchasing anything else from my site.

When I went to Paypal to refund her money I could not find a transaction for the email she had given me. I finally did locate the transaction; at a different email than what she was using. I refunded the email.

When I went back to email her and let her know about it, there was a even WORSE email from her. She was turning me in for using fowl language and calling her names online to ETSY.

I responded and let her know that I had refunded her money. Which was sad, as her patterns had been emailed to the other address and were undoubtedly setting there waiting on her now. I told her to enjoy them as they would be the last of my pattern she ever saw.

A few minutes later I get another payment where she reordered and repayed for the pattern. She also sent me an email letting me know they had been sitting in her inbox for days and she refused to "steal" them by not paying for them. But it was still my fault.

THE BEANS

Steve decided on the spur of the moment we were going out to eat tonight. You have no idea how rare this is, so I jumped and we headed out. It was All-You-Can eat Catfish at the local BBQ place. We went in and order two all you can eats for Steve and I. Then I asked the lady, "What about my son?" and I pointed to Will.

She looked at him and shook her head confused.

"Can he just eat off our plates? Or, do you have a child's version?"

I was told that under no way could he eat off our plates and it would cost an extra $11 for him to have his own plate. This is such crap. At the most, Will would eat 1/2 a piece of fish, 5 or 6 fries, and two or three spoons of beans . . . $11? I don't think so.

So I look over their limited menu and order him a corn dog. It takes so long to pay and get our drinks that our food is on the counter waiting on us when we finish. But not Will's corn dog. I ask about it and the lady tells me they forgot to put it in; it will be 9 minutes.

Nine minute? I'm suppose to sit at a table and eat in front of my four year old, without sharing, for nine minutes? Hey, I'm already pissed at the BITCH, now this lady is working my last nerve.

We sit down and Will wants a bite. I try to give him a fry, no interest. I sneak him a bean on a fork and that is the jackpot. He wants beans. I feed him a few spoon fulls and then he wants his own beans. It's been about 6 or 7 minutes and I am just not comfortable eating without Will, so I decide to go buy him some beans.

I wait in line and finally get the same lady. I tell her I'd like a side of beans for my son please. She rings them up and it is $3.99. FOUR FRIGGING DOLLARS for a side of beans?

"You have got to be joking?" I tell her. "First I can't buy a discounted meal for my son. Then you forget to cook his corn dog. Then I have to wait NINE minutes while you do cook it and we're sitting at the table with food. And now you want to charge me $4 for a "side" of beans?"

She sort of shakes her head in that I've-done-to-many-drugs-in-my-life-and-have-no-idea-why-you-are-yelling-at-me gesture.

"Well," I ask the dumb druggie, "Can you cancel the corn dog then? It doesn't make much since to pay for a four dollar corn dog and a four dollar bowl of beans now does it?"

I think my eyes changed colors or my head begin to twirl because she got this panicked look on her face. Then she started hitting buttons on the register. Then she just gave me a bowl of beans and told me they were free.

A few minutes later she brought the corn dog to my table: and they don't deliver in this joint.

A few minutes later she brought an extra serving of fish and hush puppies to the table.

I swear she bowed a little as she backed away, never taking her eyes off me.