Walmart Wine

I've had several occurrences in the last week that have really taken me back - back to what I'm not sure.

First, there was my attendance at the World Championship Goat Cook off this last weekend. And while the word "world" in the title may make it seem more important, it was really just a little hick festival held in my home town. It's huge to those that live in the area. The rest of the world? Not so much.

It's three days of heavy beer drinking, gorging on food cooked on a bbq pit, loud (and opposing) music played in every tent, and oppresive heat. So basically, you have a bunch of old red neck boys in stained t-shirts that haven't taken a bath in days. Everyone is covered in sweat, dust, and smells like bbq smoke.

I'm not going to lie to you, it's fun. But it's a shock to my system after living in Austin all year. But as my Aunt Cindy says, you get enough alcohol in me and the hillbilly comes out. And I'm always shocked when it does. Buried deep in side (or maybe not so deep) is still the small town girl with the hick accent.

Besides the cookoff, other things have come up this week to remind me of my roots.

I was having coffee with my friend, Leticia, on Tuesday night and she told me a story that made me laugh so hard I almost fell off my chair. Her husband was born and raised in New York city. The closest he's ever lived to 'country' is the subdivision where they reside in Buda. When she took him to meet her family in Del Rio he was ASTOUNDED when the first thing he saw at her folks place was a bunch of men pulling a live (and kicking) goat out of the trunk of a car. Apparently the family had a huge old car, no truck, and a farm. That part of the story didn't seem off to me at all. I grew up like that. It was his reaction that killed me.

"But, but, they have a goat..."
"In the car! A live goat."
"It could get hurt!"
"What are they doing with a goat in the car?"
Did I forget to mention he's a vegetarian.

Then tonight, I finished off a nice bottle of sweet red wine and Steve poured me a glass from some wine I have sitting on the counter. I take a drink and shudder. I've been trying out different reds the last few months and not all of them are worth drinking; which I shared with Steve.

"You know, I think I'm going to have to stop buying wine at Walmart . . ."

That was as far as I got. Steve started laughing so hard I was afraid he was going to choke on his beer. I guess my raising was shining through again, 'cause I don't see anything wrong with buying wine at Walmart . . . if you can find one that tastes decent.

Apparently, others agree with Steve though. Here is a list David Letterman put up regarding Walmart wines:

10. “When Kmart Wine Just Won’t Do”
9. “I Can’t Believe It’s Not Wine”
8. “Show Your Friends How Little You Care”
7. “Kills Germs on Contact”
6. “Recommended by 4 Out of 5 Drifters!”
5. “Crack Open a Can Today!”
4. “Fresh From the Vineyards of Aisle 6″
3. “Here’s to Making Bail!”
2. “Feeling Down After Being Thrown Out by Britney?”
1. “Goes Great With a 20-Dollar Hooker”