The Snake is Back

A few months ago, Steve went to help my brother Paul move into a new apartment. Besides reducing from a house to an apartment, Paul was having to get rid of a lot of his ex's stuff at the same time. Steve brought home the snake statue shown above. Paul, the man with good taste, was throwing it away.

Why, you ask yourself, other than an obvious lack of taste, would my husband bring home such an interesting piece of yard art? Because he thought it would go well with our other yard art, an alligator.



Normally, this alligator lives in the greenery near our front door and has been known to scare the s_ _ t out of people. It scared our neighbor at least the first twelve times he came over after we purchased it. Yes, even the alligator is kind of tacky - I really wouldn't expect to see it on the White House lawn. But it's fun.

The snake, howere, I hated on site. But I said nothing. Who knows, cheap statues crack easily . . . especially when bumped with lawn mowers driven by blind wives.

The very next day a friend of ours from down the road stopped by and he LOVED the snake. He wanted it. Seriously, he literally asked for it. You'll be proud to know I didn't send it home with him. But when Steve came home I made sure to mention how taken Rex was with the snake. Steve grabbed a few beers and the snake and headed up to Rex's.

That was at least a month or so ago.

On the way from taking the trash out the other morning I nearly pissed myself as I come around the corner to find a coiled snake ready to strike. No, it didn't scare me. I just have to find another no-class friend of Steve's to talk into taking the snake home. Oh, and make sure their wives are more accommodating.

Of coarse, if that doesn't work out, I will be doing a lot of mowing this summer.