Random Weirdness

I haven't had anything big to blog about, but occasionally something odd comes up that I'd like to share. So enjoy my montage of random weirdness.

Tomato Juice
At some random store Will found a squishy tomato that you throw at the wall. It splats, sticks for just a moment, then reforms and falls off the wall. I'm positive we paid no more than $2 for it.

For weeks it was his most prized possession. He'd play with it until it got dirty, then we'd wash it off. He took it in the car, slept with it, and bathed with it. The night before his birthday, he took it into the shower and came out crying hysterically. It had a hole and the liquid had all drained out. He cried for half an hour. It was heart breaking.

While he was at school the next day I ran to four different stores looking for a replacement, but didn't find one. Will and I both looked at an additional five stores over the next four days. Nothing.

During this same time period, Will and I were at the grocery and happen to walk through the produce department. He saw a tomato and made the ugliest face. I was like, "What is wrong with you? You've never even tasted a tomato." He informed me he had bitten his tomato and the juice had been YUCKY!

(Oh yeah, we finally found him a replacement.)

This is Not a BAR!
Crossing the parking lot of our local grocery store the other day, I was shocked to hear a woman cussing casually during a conversation with her friend. She wasn't just saying "damn, shit, or hell". No, this woman used the big "f" like it was going out of style.

"And I told that mother "f" asshole that if he wanted to ever "f" see me again, he'd better "f" get his "f" shit straightened the "f" out."

And that was only one sentence. She was loud enough I could hear her four cars before we got even with them, and four cars past them. The entire time my five year old is listening. If that wasn't bad enough, the woman with Lady"F" had two small children of her own.

I shot the lady a dirty look and hustled Will along as fast as possible. But I couldn't help but think how rude and unacceptable her behaviour was. What the "f"? It wasn't like I was at a "f" bar, tattoo parlour or strip joint. She had no "f" right to be talking that way in front of my "f" kid!

I Can Hear You
I am AMAZED at what people will discuss on their cell phones in public. Apparently, in their little world, talking on the phone limits the range of their voice to just those meant to hear it.

I was sitting two table over from a woman at Chick-Fil-A the other day. Will was playing in their tiny playscape and like most of the moms, I was sitting at the table waiting on him.

I had to listen -- really, there was no option but sticking my fingers in my ears and humming -- the woman tell someone over the phone about her visit to the doctor that morning. Oh, that's not the bad part. The bad part is what she had to see the doctor for; feminine dryness - which apparently is normal while nursing.

Damned with Faint Praise
I grew up hearing this phrase, but it's never been as real to me until I hit my forties. I don't know if it's because I am not around people as much, and therefore more aware of exactly what they are saying, or if people are just getting stupider.

Tonight, I was talking on the phone with an insurance representative about health insurance. After talking about 10 minutes, the lovely feminine voice on the other end asks for my age. I tell her - it's 43. Her response?

"Oh, you don't sound that old."