Teaching my UT class tomorrow

I teach an informal class at UT once a semester on making your own sewing patterns.

I don't do it for the money. You make a whopping $15 an hour the the schedules hours of your class; mine is 3 hours long. It costs me $9 to park anywhere near my class. It takes me 3-5 hours to prepare for my class and the day of class I spend at least 6-7 hours preparing, driving to/from, and overseeing the class. Not a huge money maker.

I don't do it for the advertising either. Due to the complexity of the class and the need for hands-on involvement from the instructor (that would be me), I have to limit the class to only 10 students. So it in no way compensates in advertising to the public for the time or energy I put into it.

I teach the class partly to help myself maintain, even in a small way, a professional front. After so many years away from an office and constant interaction with people, I find the most basic work related skills are almost nonexistent. I also teach the class to stretch myself, to pull me out of my comfort zone and force me to interact with strangers. And it doesn't look bad on a resume either.

But this class happened to be scheduled less than 2 weeks from the day my younger sister committed suicide. And while life is moving on and I am learning to cope with my grief, I just don't feel up to facing a room full of strangers for 3 solid hours. Much less being nice to them.

Oddly, the thought to cancel the class never occurred to me. I teach this class to force myself out into the public and I figure I need that worse now than ever before. What I did was call my friend Charlene and ask her to attend with me. Knowing someone I am comfortable with will be in the room with me has made the though of class more bearable.

Now as I put in the laborious hours before class to make my whooping $3 an hour ($45 - $9 for parking = $36 divided by 12 hours of time spent on preparing/giving class) I feel comforted rather than overwhelmed.

Thank you my friend.