The Suicide Letter

We've known from the time we found out about Becky's death, that she had left a letter behind. Her roommate is illiterate and could not read it. As soon as the police showed up they took the letter in as evidence.

Byjo and Tim, Becky's son, have tried repeatedly to get a copy of the suicide letter over the last two months. Hoping, I am sure, for some closure. Some answers. Maybe even some assurance that they weren't to blame.

Monday, Byjo and Tim drove back to Tyler and talked to the detective over Becky's suicide again. This time he was able to release into their care the suicide letter as well as other personal items they had taken. And after hearing what the letter said, I am thankful it took so long to be released.

The majority of the letter was about the man Becky had been obsessed with. That is her story and there is no need for me to go into it. Of her family? Of those of us that have cried and fought to put our lives back together? To those that took out huge loans to pay the cost of her funeral? To those that helped her son and cleaned out her house and storage?

She said, "And don't give any of my stuff to my family. They never cared about me when I was alive and they won't care about me when I'm dead."

And of her only son?

She said, "... don't give any money to my family, or especially to Tim, as they'll just waist it on something."

It was shocking, sad, and maddening. But in the long run I have only one thing to say to her letter and the thoughts she expressed in it . . .


She wasn't sane when she committed suicide.
That's kind of the point, right?
So you can't take anything she said in her letter
to be her true opinion of her family or her life.


I am going to continue to think of her as my same old sister. The one that loved me. That thought of me. That called me. That knew I would do anything for her she needed.

The letter, that I'll forget.